An Outfit for Every Occasion
by Across the Stars
Summary: Spoilers up to 1x15 "Hell-O". The story behind one of Kurt's accessories.


**Quinntessential**: Puck was being a dick again today. He pretty much told me that I needed to lose weight. Seriously, does he have any semblance of caring at all?!

Kurt sighed at Quinn's message. They'd become good friends in the past several months, bonding over a mutual hate for Rachel Berry and a mutual love for Gucci footwear and had been thick as thieves since.

**ArmaniArmy**: Yes, he does have feelings & he does care and I think you know that. Take, for example, when he stole the money for Artie's bus to Sectionals. It was wrong, but he did it for you and the baby. He's def. misguided and totally out of line telling you that you needed to lose weight. Doesn't he know that you're carrying his child?! People gain weight when they're in the family way.

**Quinntessential**: Please don't refer to my condition as being in the "family way" it sounds sooooo Little House on the Prairie :p

**ArmaniArmy**: fiiiiiiine.

**Quinntessential**: & I know he was out of line, but it hurt a lot bc idk what I feel about him anymore. I mainly feel guilty for sleeping with him in the first place, and I kindasorta hate Rachel for screwing up my thing with Finn. I know I told her I wasn't pissed at her, but to be honest, I was in shock and did not have full command of my emotions.

**ArmaniArmy**: I'm still hung up on Puck calling you fat. It was a really shitty thing to do and the more that I think about it the more angry I get.

**Quintessential**: Well I guess it isn't TOO big of a deal, but if you want to be noble and protect my honor, you could slap him or something.

**ArmaniArmy**: ........

**Quinntessential**: jk

**ArmaniArmy**: I may actually do that. Maybe hahahha. Anyhoo, it's past time for me to get my 8 hours of sleep and I'm going to regret it tomorrow morning when I have to dig out my heavy duty concealer. G'night hot momma hahahha

Kurt closed the top of his MacBook Air and stretched his arms over his head, leaning side to side so he could crack his back. He wasn't kidding when he told Quinn that he was pissed at Puck-it seemed almost like it was the straw that broke the camel's back (even if it really didn't have anything to do with him). Two years of bullying at Puck's hands was hard to forget, and even though he had been marginally nicer once he knew how a slushie facial felt, Kurt was still unconvinced that the jock had actually changed. Years of suppressed anger bubbled to the surface of his consciousness as he crawled into his bed, and Kurt found it hard to sleep while planning revenge.

* * *

The morning of Operation Smack The Shit Out of Puck dawned bright and shiny. Kurt selected a particularly fierce outfit, topped with his new Michael Kors turtleneck scarf. He grabbed half a bagel, said goodbye to his father and set off for McKinley. During his drive to school, Kurt tried to plan exactly what he was going to say to Puck, searching for the right words to get his point across while sounding eloquent and scathing at the same time. It proved to be a taxing exercise that would keep Kurt busy all morning, causing Kurt to miss a question in his World History class, which was really reaalllyyy embarrassing, because he was the smartest person in there and it was tearing down his rep.

When the bell rang for lunch, Kurt skulked through a back hallway to the weightlifting room, where Puck had taken to hiding out once his popularity dropped several levels on the social food chain. Kurt could hear soft grunting in the room, signaling Puck's presence. He wiped his sweaty palms on his Miss Sixty's jeans (hey, they made his ass look totally hot) and shoved the door open. Puck dropped the barbell he was lifting to glare at Kurt.

"Hummel."

"Puckerman".

"Get out".

"No. I have something to say and I'm not leaving until I get it out".

"Well spit it the fuck out, I have major iron to pump".

Kurt took a deep breath; it was go time. "Quinn told me what you said to her about her weight yesterday and I think it's pathetic and extremely self-centered of you to treat her like one of your Cheerio sluts that you can manipulate because they're so insecure. Quinn's being the bigger person here, carrying your child for 9 months while you screw around on the side, which is despicable. You really ought to be ashamed of yourself, Puck, because right now, you're only slightly above Sarah Palin on my hate list, which is saying a lot,"

Kurt felt a surge of relief once he finished speaking. He'd said his piece without messing up and making a fool of himself, he successfully evaded tripping over weights that were scattered around the room, and he definitely did NOT focus on Puck's very entrancing biceps. Seriously, his body was like a Greek sculpture, Kurt thought before he shook the unwarranted thought out of his head. He liked Finn, and that was it. Puck's arms had no place in his mind, whatsoever...but they stuck there like gum on the bottom of a Jimmy Choo.

"You don't know half the story, fairy. And besides, when the hell did you and Quinn become best friends? Last I checked, she thought she would catch your gay. What makes you think you have the right to barge in on my lunch?"

"You're not eating, and you're not even supposed to be in the weight room! And you can bet your ass that I'm not leaving until you apologize for what you said to Quinn."

"Why is it so fucking important to you? Besides, it wouldn't matter if I did, because she's still in love with Finn. Both of you are," Puck said, glaring at Kurt. "Why does he get everything? He's the football star, the Glee star and he has everyone panting after him. Why do I have to be second best?"

Kurt wasn't sure how to respond to this. On one hand, he felt a bit of sympathy for Puck, who may have more to him than meets the eye. However, Kurt was SO not into being Puck's therapist; he had a garden salad waiting for him in the cafeteria.

"Seriously, the man has even fags freaking out over him. Yeah, I'm talkin' about you, Hummel. You don't think I saw you jizz your tight pants when Finn sang the Doors song, and you think I don't notice how you're always fucking looking at him in the locker room and how you throw yourself at him at every single opportunity. It's fucking pathetic, dude.

"Don't call me dude," Kurt replied, trying to hide his embarrassment; he didn't think he was being THAT obvious. "Whatever, I'm done with this conversation. If you're going to act like a puerile idiot, then I'm not going to listen to it. Apologize to Quinn, put on your big boy panties, suck it up and stop wallowing in self-pity. It's unattractive," Kurt flipped the ends of his scarf over his shoulder and made to swish out of the weight room when he was unceremoniously jerked backward.

"What the hell?" he squeaked, grasping at the scarf. "This cost more than you're worth, Puckerman!"

Puck spun the soprano around and shoved him against the dingy green wall, relishing in the sound that came out of Kurt's mouth as the wind was knocked out of him. "Have you ever thought that maybe comments like that are what makes me into a puerile idiot? Maybe I'm tired of being shit on constantly by people. Maybe it's people like you who look down their noses at me and treat me like something they'd scrape off the bottom of their shoe. Maybe it's pretentious scrawny guys like you who wear stupid scarves that really piss me off."

"Well, that's not my problem, is it?" Kurt sniped, trying to keep in control of the situation, but he couldn't deny that being pinned to a wall by a veritable Adonis was very, very hot.

"You talk too much, kid." Puck murmered, leaning into Kurt's face.

"I'm only six months younger than you. If that's your operational definition of a kid then-" Kurt was cut off by Puck's mouth covering his, swallowing his indignant squeaks. Kurt tried to grasp some hair at the back of Puck's head to pull him away, but Puck took that as a sign of encouragement, snaking his arm around Kurt's waist and tugging him closer. Puck tore his mouth away from the younger boy's, breathing heavily and looking into Kurt's clear blue eyes. Kurt's lips were puffy and red, his fragile chest rising and falling rapidly.

"What the hell, Puck?!" Kurt hissed. Puck's response was to dive back into kissing him and tugging off the damn turtleneck scarf. Once the offending garment was removed, Puck attached his lips to Kurt's neck, no doubt creating massive hickies. Kurt's breathy moans only served to fuel the flames of his desire and Puck grabbed one of Kurt's muscular legs and hooked it around his waist, pressing the boy's body closer to his. Kurt's hands were now clutching at the back of Puck's shirt, holding on for dear life, his moans growing more and more desperate.

"You like this, Hummel?" Puck mumbled into Kurt's neck, licking a hot stripe up to his ear and gently biting his earlobe. At this, Kurt jerked his hips into Puck's pelvis, making his approval known.

"And what about this?" Puck asked, reaching his hand down to cup Kurt's growing erection through his tight designer jeans. Kurt moaned loudly, sending shivers down Puck's spine.

Then, the bell rang signaling the end of lunch and Puck grinned devilishly. He untangled himself from Kurt, quickly pocketed Kurt's iPhone when he wasn't looking, grabbed his backpack and was out the door with a wink, leaving Kurt hunched weakly against the wall.

* * *

Several hours later, Kurt was in Glee, his scarf wrapped tightly around his neck, chastising Rachel for fraternizing with the enemy. He could still feel Puck's lips burning on his skin and his stomach still felt like it was filled with champagne bubbles.

* * *

As Kurt approached his car after school, he noticed something glinting on his windshield. Upon further inspection, he noticed that it was the iPhone he didn't even know he was missing. A message was flashing on the screen from **Puckzilla: Tomorrow, same time same place**. Kurt couldn't help but smile.


End file.
